Victoria Noe

Award-winning Author, Speaker, Activist

Big Changes for Friend Grief


UPDATE - 11/1/12

HURRICANE SANDY-RELATED DELAY FOR E-BOOK LAUNCH. DON'T WORRY - IT'S COMING!




If I’ve seemed quiet lately, there’s a reason. I’ve been attending a conference and doing research, which took a lot of time. But November will be a big month for Friend Grief.

On November 2, the first in a series of small books on the topic of grieving your friends will be released. Friend Grief and Anger: When Your Friend Dies and No One Gives a Damnwill expand on a few earlier blog posts on anger. It will be available on all e-book platforms, and the links will be posted here as soon as they’re available. For my followers in the UK, Canada and Australia, you’ll be able to get it right away, too. If you’re keeping score, November 2 is Day of the Dead.

The print version (about 60 pages) is targeted for release on November 19, which was Delle Chatman’s birthday. I felt it was appropriate, since I wouldn’t be doing any of this without her. I’ll be doing a book signing/launch at the coffee house in Chicago that was our hangout.

My plan is to release the second book, on grieving friends who died of AIDS, on Dec. 1, with subsequent titles in the series released every other month through 2013.

As soon as they’re confirmed, I’ll list additional information – reviews, book signings, etc. – here on this blog. New resources – on and offline – will also be added in the next few weeks.

And after the first of the year, there will be a redesign of the whole blog/website, but let’s get through the holidays first. J

Your feedback is always welcome and appreciated. If you have an opinion about something I wrote, please comment. If you’d like to share a story about a friend of yours who died, email me. If you know of someone who would benefit from what we discuss here, share this link. As always, remember that I’m not a medical professional, and this blog is never intended to be a substitute for therapeutic help.

One of the terrific aspects of this new career of mine is that I believe I have a deeper appreciation of my friends. I find myself reaching out, sometimes self-consciously, in ways that often surprise me.

For example: I don’t have a picture of myself with Delle, just the two of us. I have pictures where we’re with a group, but no picture of just us. We were always the ones taking pictures and never thought to include ourselves. I regret that a lot.

Last Friday I asked the wife of a friend of mine to take my picture with him. I have lots of pictures of him, but again, none of just the two of us. I was a little embarrassed to ask, but I got over it.

I don’t know if anyone can live their life without regretting things they didn’t do. But I’m trying more and more to risk that momentary embarrassment: to pose for that picture, to make that phone call, to say ‘I love you’ while I can.

Try it. You’ll be glad you did.