Victoria Noe

Award-winning Author, Speaker, Activist

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Friend Grief Without (too much) Guilt

Friend Grief Without (too much) Guilt
Dec 11, 2014 by Victoria Noe
There are different kinds of guilt. There’s the guilt we feel for saying or doing something that hurt someone else. And there’s the guilt we feel for not saying or doing something.About a month ago, I acted on a whim. It was something I’d thought about doing for a while, but hadn’t done. What possessed me, I have no idea.During college I lost touch with the guy I took to prom junior year. We did a couple musicals together, and he also came with me to my senior Christmas dance. We had fun together (not to mention my first kiss). Dan was often overshadowed by his popular older brother, a very talented actor and pianist. But I think one of...

Friend Grief - Guilt vs. Regret

Friend Grief - Guilt vs. Regret
Feb 18, 2014 by Victoria Noe
Guilt:responsibility for a crime or for doing something bad or wrong; a bad feeling caused by knowing or thinking that you have done something bad or wrong. Regret:to mourn the loss or death of; to miss very much; to be very sorry for.(Definitions courtesy of Merriam-Webster Dictionary) Often when a friend dies, we feel overwhelmed by what might have been. There are good memories to comfort us, stories we can share with other friends. But often – too often – the negative feelings overshadow everything else. And we feel guilty.Or do we? There are certainly times when guilt is an accurate response to the news that a friend has died. If you promised to call/visit, and then blew them off...

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