Victoria Noe

Award-winning Author, Speaker, Activist

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end-of-life decisions

Letting Your Friend Die

Letting Your Friend Die
Oct 25, 2013 by Victoria Noe
benawyn.wordpress.comI think most people agree that everyone has the right to make decisions about their health. No one wants to be forced to have medical procedures they don’t want. And who wouldn’t want to decide their own end-of-life care? But theory can be very different from practice, especially when it comes to our friends.I remember when my friend, Delle Chatman, announced she was discontinuing treatment for yet another recurrence of ovarian cancer. Before that, she’d led us to expect miracles each time it came back. But after a month of treatments, she emailed her friends to say her body couldn’t take anymore. Everyone agreed in theory that the decision was her right. But that didn’t mean we weren’t angry....

What A Death Café is All About

What A Death Café is All About
Aug 03, 2013 by Victoria Noe
Dan Bulf and I recently facilitated our second Death Café in the Chicago area, this time in the near north suburb of Evanston. It was a huge success, just in terms of numbers: more than double what we expected.Our next one will be held August 19 in a larger space, at the Evanston Public Library. That one’s filling up very quickly, too. We will undoubtedly have to cut off registrations soon, especially because of the great press coverage we’ve received. REGISTRATION IS NOW CLOSED.Hereis a terrific article by Jessica Reynolds in this weekend’s Chicago Tribune. It gives you a real sense of what it’s like to be there: the conversation, the emotion, the camaraderie.You can sign up for our mailing...

Dying Matters 2012

Dying Matters 2012
Apr 25, 2012 by Victoria Noe
Most people will do anything to avoid those end-of-life conversations. Who wants to talk about ‘extraordinary means’, much less who’s going to get your grandmother’s jewelry? But doing so when we are able to not just discuss these issues but make decisions is something important for us all.The Dying Matters Coalition was founded in London in 2009 “to support changing knowledge, attitudes and behaviours towards death, dying and bereavement, and through this to make ‘living and dying well’ the norm". It has 16,000 members (full disclosure: I’m one).May 14-20 is Dying Matters Awareness Week. You may see stories pop up on TV and the Internet that will personify this year’s theme “Small Actions, Big Differences”.It’s a great theme, because it...

Online Resources: Dying Matters

Online Resources: Dying Matters
Apr 18, 2011 by Victoria Noe
Despite all the hysteria about ‘death panels’, there is a critical need for each and every one of us to thoughtfully consider end-of-life plans. It’s an uncomfortable subject for most people. But avoiding the subjects of where we want to spend our final days and how, what kind of services we want held, and how we want to be remembered will not make them go away.Dying Matters is a UK-based nonprofit coalition. This is from their website:“In 2009 the National Council for Palliative Care (NCPC) set up the Dying Matters Coalition to promote public awareness of dying, death and bereavement. Our members include organisations from across the NHS, voluntary and independent  health and care sectors (including hospices, care homes, charities supporting old people,...