Fag Hags, Divas and Moms
A B.R.A.G. Medallion Honoree
Finalist, 2019 A&U Magazine Literature of the Year Award
The history of the AIDS epidemic has largely been told from the perspective of gay men: their losses, struggles and contributions. But what about the women - in particular, straight women? Not just Elizabeth Taylor and Princess Diana, but thousands whose accomplishments have never been recognized?
For almost forty years, straight women have have been affected by HIV/AIDS. They have fought for the right to be included in clinical trials and qualify for disability benefits. They have raised money and awareness. They have devoted their lives to caregiving, medical research and advocacy. But until now, their stories have been ignored or forgotten, even in accounts of women's history.
Drawing on personal interviews and archival research, Fag Hags, Divas and Moms: The Legacy of Straight Women in the AIDS Community is the first book to share the stories of these women around the world, throughout the epidemic. Some of the names are familiar; most are not. But all have left a lasting impact on the fight against a virus that has killed over 40 million people around the world, half of them women.
Author, speaker and activist Victoria Noe assures their place in women's history, for their determination to educate and advocate, to end the epidemic once and for all.
"Noe’s book celebrates one sector of this compassionate network of caregivers with empathy, appreciation, solidarity, and immense pride. An obvious labor of love for the author and a moving tribute to the unsung heroes of the AIDS crisis" - Kirkus Reviews
"Offering a new and long overdue perspective on the AIDS epidemic (and one that is still very much on-going within the gay community and around the world in the general population), Fag Hags, Divas and Moms: The Legacy of Straight Women in the AIDS Community is an extraordinary compendium of information and illustrative personal stories. Exceptionally well-written, organized and presented, Fag Hags, Divas and Moms is unreservedly recommended for both community and academic libraries". - Midwest Book Review
"This lucid and detailed account provides a valuable timeline for those interested in and impacted by the AIDS crisis". - Publishers Weekly/BookLife
SECOND EDITION - Summer, 2025! Read more about it here!
Blog Categories
- HIV
- women's history
- AIDS
- Friend Grief
- Friendship
- Grief
- Celebrity deaths
- grieving styles
- aging
- grieving
- George Harrison
- The Concert for George
- Names Project
- Disenfranchised grief
- Kenneth Doka
- “Family Ties”
- friends
- 9/11
- bereavement
- Valentine's Day
- Eric Clapton
- Facebook memorials
- men's grief
- Big Chill
- Delle Chatman
- Slides
- friendgrief
- cumulative grief
- Dying Matters
- end-of-life decisions
- Kathleen Pooler
- intuitive grieving
- survivor guilt
- gay community
- Longtime Companion
- grief support
- public grief
- Aurora Winter
- Elizabeth Taylor
- life stories
- online grief support
- StoryCorps
- Everybody's Talking About Surprises
- Kristina McMorris
- mass blogging day
- Caring Bridge
- FDNY
- Rudy Giuliani
- eulogies
- Fr. Mychal Judge
- father’s day
- types of grievers
- Memorial Day
- military
- WW2
- hospice
- Osama bin Laden
- September 11
- closure
- World Trade Center
- Chicago
- Windy City Times
- National Day of Service
- online grieving
- Paul McCartney
- Kristie West
- Beatles
- signs from beyond
- writing
- International Friendship Day
- 30-Day Challenge
- 9/11 Memorial
- Amy Dickinson
- grief blogs
- grief websites
- social media day
- Mesirow
- anger
- workplace grief
- Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
- stages of grief
- National Ovarian Cancer Coalition
- ovarian cancer
- Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month
- Ovarian Cancer Symptom Awareness
- Marines
- Medal of Honor
- Sgt. Dakota Meyer
- Winnie the Pooh
- 10th anniversary of 9/11
- Ground Zero
- British Gardens
- Damon DiMarco
- Tower Stories
- 110 Stories
- “The Guys”
- genealogy
- Story Corps
- Voices of September 11
- hurricane Irene
- Death Café
- Uncategorized
- Eric Zorn
- friendships
- John Lennon
- Grief Speaks
- Lisa Athan
- “Living in the Material World”
- funeral arrangements
- Carol Marin
- Mary Schmich
- Steve Daley
- anger and grief
- 50/50 movie
- Steve Jobs
- Mychal’s Message
- New Year’s resolutions
- Mary Tyler Moore
- holidays
- The Big Chill
- complicated grief
- Michael J. Fox
- “The Lives They Lived”
- New York Times
- World AIDS Day
- Davy Jones
- girlfriends
- Deanna Watson
- Nick Gholson
- Jeff Zaslow
- boomers
- Glenn Wright
- House of Spoof Collective
- If I Die
- Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
- baby boomers
- Porter Anderson
- The Good Men Project
- Writing on the Ether
- Small Actions Big Difference
- Huffington Post
- Sayan Sarkar
- guys research
- Live For The Moment
- The Fall Gallery
- University of British Columbia
- grief and guilt
- end of life
- grief and anger
- bucket list
- The Buried Life
- "50/50"
- ACT UP
- LGBTQ
- ADEC
- ADEC12
- APA
- depression
- DSM-5
- Dan Wheldon
- Christopher Meeks
- HuffPost50
- caregiving
- compassion fatigue
- McKnights Long Term Care
- Patricia Smith
- Tracey Carruthers
- Coach Carruthers
- loss
- virtualdavis
- Google+
- Cup of Joe for a Joe
- Green Beans Coffee
- social media
- virtual friends
- instrumental grieving
- first responders
- nuns
- Dr. Beth Erickson
- Dr. Karen Gail Lewis
- Anna Quindlen
- memoir
- Plenty of Cake
- Justyna Palka
- Karl Sprague
- The Short Distance
- Jeanne Veillette Bowerman
- Ramblings of a Recovered Insecureaholic
- Slavery by Another Name
- Hospice of the Valley
- Legacy.com
- Marty Tousley
- Aurora
- shootings
- high school
- reunions
- AIDS Quilt
- birthdays
- Creativity and Crisis
- Smithsonian Folkways Festival
- regret
- Fr. Michael Duffy
- Franciscans
- Connie Ragen Green
- denial
- United in Anger
- Ringo Starr
- Gigaom
- Matthew Ingram
- blog
- Day of the Dead
- Elton John
- Elton John AIDS Foundation
- Love is the Cure
- Ryan White
- How to Survive a Plague
- Baylor University
- cancer
- Christopher Hitchens
- Mortality
- Pam Sherman
- Suburban Outlaw
- Tony Scott
- Boston marathon. terrorism
- senior citizens
- women
- writing group
- veterans
- 60 Minutes
- suicide
- The Life and Death of Clay Hunt
- anticipatory grief
- Mary Ellen McGarry
- memorial services
- blame
- US Navy
- death
- Marcus Luttrell
- firefighters
- self-care
- Genevieve Creighton
- Whistler
- Newtown
- medical personnel
- performing artists
- Catholic
- rituals
- Evanston
- Five Wishes
- internet
- R.I.P. trolls
- tribute pages
- memories
- dying
- Jon Underwood
- PTSD
- living wills
- Nelson Mandela
- wills
- Pride Parade
- Belgrade
- Jelena Gencic
- Novak Djokovic
- tennis
- Wimbledon
- AIDS@30
- Jim Eigo
- Peter Staley
- Spencer Cox
- William Lucas Walker
- Book Expo America
- Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS
- Gay Pride Month
- HBO
- Sebastian Junger
- Tim Hetherington
- Which Way is the Front Line From Here?
- Hadiya Pendleton
- Our House
- Friend Grief and AIDS
- The Last One
- Audrey Tautou
- Delicacy
- funerals
- ThrowbackThursday
- Chicago Tribune
- Metropolis Coffee
- Dallas Buyers Club
- Jared Leto
- Matthew McConnaughey
- Afghanistan
- William Swenson
- Glencoe
- music
- National Suicide Awareness Month
- Stop Soldier Suicide
- New York City
- NYPD
- Audrey Pellicano
- Madeline Sharples
- storytelling
- Idina Menzel
- If/Then
- #BEA14
- Author Hub
- Friend Grief and the Military
- NYC
- self-publishing
- BGSQD
- moral injury
- Army
- Captain Jennifer Moreno
- Kyle White
- CAPS
- Printers Row Lit Fest
- Arthur M. Fischman
- Meryl Ain
- Stewart Ain
- The Living Memories Project
- American Women Veterans
- Chicagoland Authors Promoting Success
- National Veterans Art Museum
- grief police
- mourning
- corpsmen
- medics
- hierarchy of grief
- Sean Strub
- Carole King
- Harold Ramis
- Philip Seymour Hoffman
- guilt
- Housing Works
- battle buddies
- Veterans Day
- CHANGES
- Sally Ember
- Friend Grief and 9/11
- Friend Grief and Anger
- Friend Grief in the Workplace
- In Print Writers
- Rockford
- LA Law
- GMHC
- Perry Halkitis
- Queen Elizabeth II Memorial Gardens
- writing about grief
- Robin Williams
- Writers Digest Conference
- classmates
- Nerinx Hall
- Sisters of Loretto
- St. Louis
- business
- Brendan O'Connell
- Capital Fringe Festival
- theatre
- friendship friend grief
- health
- LGBT
- Chicago theatre
- Fred Eberle
- Laurel Cronin
- Brain Injury Awareness Week
- concussion
- TBI
- The Red Pump Project
- women and AIDS
- Women and GIrls' HIV/AIDS Awareness Day
- Leonard Nimoy
- Mr. Spock
- Star Trek
- nonfiction
- Rebecca Bricker
- Tales from Tavanti
- Nicholas Kristof
- shaming
- Pierre Jalbert
- Combat
- St. Louis Cardinals
- Dan Blank
- Gabriela Pereira
- Libraries Illinois Conference
- Charlie Sheen
- Paris attacks
- Friend Grief and Men: Defying Stereotypes
- Josephine Stewart
- David Bowie
- Vanessa Hudgens
- Grammy's
- Joe Biden
- Mark Liebenow
- Women's History Month
- Nancy Duncan
- Planned Parenthood
- Andrea Johnson
- Indie authors
- Writing conferences
- Military Outreach USA
- Orlando
- Pulse
- Grantchester
- Al Katkowsky
- George Davis
- Women & Children First
- Ghalala Khan
- Divas and Moms
- Fag Hags
- teaching
- Chicago Public Library
- Evergreen Park Public Library
- Indie Author Day
- Library Journal
- Villa Park Public Library
- baseball
- Jose Fernandez
- Miami Marlins
- straight women
- Hallmark Channel
- AIDSWatch
- editing
- authors
- books
- writers
- CarePartners
- CareTeams
- Trudy James
- AIDS/Lifecycle
- Bank of America
- Susan Freed
- interviewing
- Rebecca Skloot
- public speaking
- The Muse and the Marketplace
- HIV Long-Term Survivors Awareness Day
- Gays Against Guns
- research
- Hamilton
- marketing
- Jessica Cage
- Oswego
- Penned Con
- Success
- Las Vegas
- Librarians
- Libraries
- terrorist attacks
- holiday gifts
- Luvvie Ajayi
- Nasty Women
- Pat McKinzie
- Jeremy McCarter
- John McPhee
- Lin-Manuel Miranda
- Rania Zeithar
- word of the year
- Gus Kenworthy
- Pip Kenworthy
- Winter Olympics
- Paul Bauer
- Police
- Rachel Maddow
- Rebecca Makkai
- The Great Believers
- Alliance of Independent Authors
- Build Book Buzz
- Big Gay Ice Cream
- Bosie Tea Parlor
- IndieLab
- PenAmerica
- To Absent Friends
- Savoy Hotel
- Bonaventure House
- Armistead Maupin
- binge-reading
- Tales of the City
- Peter Tork
- Andrew Velez
- A&U Magazine
- TPAN
- Stonewall Inn
- Nursing
- US Conference on AIDS
- Carol D. Marsh
- Nurses on the Inside
- Remaking a Life
- Taking Turns
- COVID-19
- coronavirus
- CALOR
- Rosa E. Martinez-Colon
- Krishna Stone
- #PublishingPaidMe